Last week I read this book called Last Light. I read it for purely entertainment purposes. Usually (but not always) when I read a work of fiction I don’t find much for profound truths or heavy thoughts to ponder. As I was reading this particular book, things were pretty much moving in that direction. It was an easy entertaining read. Not at all convicting or piercing in any way.
I suppose that is why when the Lord spoke to me and convicted me…it peireced right through because I wasn’t expecting it.
I had my defenses down.
This book is about a cataclysmic event (EMP strike) that takes place, that alters the lives of everyone around the world. Rather than take a doom and gloom approach, this author chose to write from a Christian perspective. He answers the question, what would this situation look like in light of those who profess to love and follow Christ?
The characters battle with fear and lack of faith. At one point the protagonists wife asks the very same questions I myself have asked on numerous occasions.
Someone (usually my beloved) will tell me that God will care for us and provide for all our needs. In needs, I am usually referring to food, clothing, and housing.
I usually reply with, but HE doesn’t always. There are MILLIONS of people all over this world who don’t have the food they need for their children. TODAY countless parents will bury their children because there is no food for them. He doesn’t HAVE to provide us with those things.
If I am real honest, I will say that scares me.
In the book her husband responded the same way mine does. He quotes Matthew 6:25-34
The answer, seek God and His kingdom and His righteousness and all these things will be added unto you.
In the book the wife took that to heart.
Sometimes I don’t. Sometimes my response is that the Lord doesn’t always provide those things to those who are seeking His kingdom and His righteousness. When Paul tells us of all the hardships he has suffered in 2 Corinthians 11 he mentions TWICE in verse 27 that is was often hungry and without food.
Was Paul not seeking the Lord and His righteousness?
I think he was.
So if I am real honest, I wonder what happened to that wonderful promise in Matthew?
Then my sweet man will tell me that I need to take to heart the command not to worry about tomorrow, because sufficient is the trouble for today. He’s right of course, and I wouldn’t say that I am worried per-say…Just trying to reconcile things in my mind.
That is usually where the conversation with my husband ends. He tells me I just need to trust, and I don’t like what trusting means.
Later on in the book, their daughter runs off with a man she barely knows, trusting him to take her to her fiance, several hundred miles aways. This man turns out to be quite dangerous.
Once again their faith is tested.
As the husband sets out to find and rescue their wayward daughter, the mother has a conversation with a wise old woman who had walked many years with the Lord, and was currently walking with Him as she died from the ravages of cancer.
At this point in her life, the mother knows all too well that God doesn’t work the way we want Him to. His ways are higher than ours, Hi thoughts Higher than ours.
His plan for us often involves suffering and suffering is not pleasant.
She asks the old woman, “What if He’s going to take her? What if He’s going to take Doug?”
The wise old woman patted her on the leg and said, Those aren’t the right questions Kay. The question is, do you trust Him? Whatever the case, whatever He has planned for you or your husband or children…Do you trust Him to do the right thing?”
That is when the Lord pierced my heart.
He loving let me know that I was asking the wrong questions.
The only question that matters is do I trust HIM.
No matter what he brings
Joy or sorrow
Plenty or want
Will I trust Him if my husband and children live out long and healthy lives?
Will I trust Him if He takes them all tomorrow?
Will I trust Him when there is money in my account and food in my cupboards?
Will I trust Him if there is no money to pay the bills and there is no food for my children?
Will I trust Him when there is peace and freedom ruling in my country?
Will I trust Him if there is tyranny, slavery, and war?
Suddenly there was such freedom.
Such overwhelming peace.
I do trust Him.
I have seen suffering…I trusted Him.
I have had plenty…I trusted Him.
I have been in want…I trusted Him.
I have faced illness in myself and loved ones…I trusted Him.
I have lost someone I love dearly…I trusted Him.
I know that He is infinitely good. He always has been, and since He is the Great Unchangeable I AM, He always will be.
I know that the depths of His love for me I could never even fathom. His love for me is great beyond all my human comprehension.
I know His wisdom is beyond measure. All His ways are right and just. Whatever He ordains is right and good.
I know that when He sends trials my way, He seeks not to harm but refine me.
Nothing else matters.
No matter what He brings my way,
I know the True and Living God, sovereign over all the universe.
I trust Him.